Week 8

*Given the topic I choose, I decided to leave out his name and things prolonging to his condition*

Today I woke up in the happy mood that I always do after sleep. I feel wonderful and try to remember the dream that was so great that I never wanted to wake up. I look at the clock and it read 9:30 am. I suppose that I should get up and get those "To Do List" items taken care of before work.

I got the dishes done, the floors swept, the kittens litter box cleaned and replenished, and my shower done. Now I was making my way to my room to get that organized when the phone rang. I answered it. "Hello", "Yes, is Alicia there?" I said that was me. "OH, good. I have you listed as an emergency contact for T____ S____, is that correct, the man asked me". "Yes I am, I'm his Goddaughter, is there a problem with him?" The gentlemen filled me in on what had happened.

The operator had called me and told me that my Godfather was walking down his porch steps and had collapsed. There was a neighbor that found him and called the paramedics. They have rushed him to the Emergency Room in Bangor, that was around 11:00 am and the operator told me that I should get there as soon as I can. Because they need information from me about him.

I called Brandon at work and told him what was going on. He told me to stay where I was that he was coming home and we would go up together. Then I called the Daycare where the kids were at and told them the situation and asked if someone could bring the kids to the house right away. They said they were already loaded in the car by the time we had hung up. Almost the time Brandon got home so did the kids. I found my Godfathers will and the legal documents I though I might need in the safety deposit box and we jumped in the car ans was off.

We arrived at the hospital and before we could see him they told us what his current state was and that they need to talk to the emergency contact that he had. That was me, so I followed the receptionist to her office and gave her what she needed. Brandon and the kids were in the waiting area, waiting for me. The nurse came over and had me fill out paperwork and told me when the doctor was through his exam that he would come talk to us.

That felt like hours even though it had been only thirty minutes. The doctor told us that he suffered from a particular brain hemorrhage. The next 24 hours they would monitor his condtion, but they didn't think that he would make it through the night. I about hit the floor and started sobbing. I remember Brandon asking the doctor a few questions and then thanking him. I also heard the doctor say he would be back later to check on him and us.

Brandon was the first to go in and see him. The children next to say there goodbyes and Brandon and I knew that he would be gone by morning. I called the babysitter that Brandon and I use to inform her of what had happened and to see if she would come to the hospital to take the children back home (they had no reason to stay there all night). She agreed and knew that we were staying and that she needed to stay the night and possibly tomorrow too. I told her that the children didn't need to go to daycare and I would call the school in the morning to let them know.

Once I made that call I called my Godfathers daughter, she was a couple hours away and was leaving for Bangor as we hung up. I didn't give her all the details as I knew she would be driving. The babysitter came and took the kids away. That is when I went to see him. Brandon kissed my forehead and said he would be right outside if I needed him. I grabbed the chair by the window and moved it closer to his bed. I grabbed his hand and started to gently rub my hand in his. He was medicated so he was completely out of it but to me he looked like he was still in pain.

I sat for a while with him not saying a word. But towards it being close to an hour I got up and kissed him goodbye, Said that he would be missed and that I loved him very much. I whispered something in his ear and left the room. His daughter was sitting next to Brandon when I came out. I gave her a big hug and kiss and filled her in on what was happening. She went in the room with him. I sat next to Brandon still crying. She was in their with him for a while. Eventually she came out when the doctor came to give us an update. She and I completely lost it as the doctor told us that with his rhythms he would only have a couple of hours left. Brandon was being strong but I knew that he was only holding it together for me and for my godfathers daughter.

If you are wondering what I whispered to him, then this is it: "Uncle T___, I hope that you can hear me and know that you are going to be missed and that you would have had another baby to look after if you were better. Know that this baby that I am carrying will always know about you and all that you have given to my life. Love you always and know that you are in our hearts always"

We alternated going in to sit with him for the next few hours. He never came off of the medication so he may not of known that we were there. As we were getting coffee from the vending machine the nurses and doctor raced to his room. We knew at that point that we had lost him as his wish was to have us follow his DNR. The doctor gave his call and told us that he had passed on. That was at 10:38 pm.